Saturday, March 30, 2013

How long will you take your relationship?

So, two days ago, as usual I taught my Korean student, Mr. So, bahasa Indonesia and we tried practicing his conversation skill in the morning. We usually speak with a topic. But, in that time, we just had regular conversation in Bahasa, more like "curhat" lol.

So, I dont know why, I wanted to talk about relationship that time eventhough there are others many things I've been thinking lately.

It started with my questions (of course original one in Bahasa Indonesia languange) :
- How did he start relationship with his wife?
- How was his feeling toward his wife at the first time? Loving her so much or has time grown it up?
- Did he realise at that time that his girlfriend would be his wife? Could he feel it?

I asked them because I often doubt myself whether I could have a chance to feel a relationship again or not. The scenario is usually like this: I find a good guy, but I always get scared to try next level. A few guys I dated may assume I am not serious person about my feeling, but the fact is I hardly fall in love with someone, and telling someone love words is one of the special thing I could have done.

But with that fact, I wonder why I am suck at starting relationship. Why did I start dates and also end it? Maybe because I am afraid to start relationship again eventhough I am serious with my feeling..? Because I am afraid to have my hopes up..? Because I am afraid my heart will be broken too hard again..?


So, that is the reason why I asked Mr So, what is the first feeling in starting relationship? I tried to remember what good feeling relationship is. I tried to remember the confidence we have before starting relationship.

Then he answered all my questions (I wont write down his full answers here ^^) and shared his love story too.. but the most interesting thing we had that time actually came at the end. At the question "How long does somebody usually take their relationship?"
Of course, no answer for that! That was dumb question, definitely.
But forgive me, my mind is still just completely blank about love right now, so I even asked about little non-sense thing! Hehe :P

So the full questions:
"How long does somebody usually take his/her relationshipHave you ever thought to leave your wife at the time when both of you were still dating, Mr So?"

He silenced for a moment, trying to find the answer, and then he answered me,
"I never thought to leave my wife when we were dating back then.
Yes, we had lots of quarrels, but I never thought to leave her for any sake. I am not sure about the answer for your question, Linda.
But in my opinion, relationship will end only when the two people want to end it. 
Love is everlasting STRUGGLE between  two people."

He gave me a big blow to my head.. and I felt somewhat uplifting feeling.

* *
But still.. I am only prioritizing to learn about Christ now and to be grown first.
So, maybe I will understand it in another time..


Dimas Muharam said...

so interesting.. :)

Linda Regina said...

Omg Dimas, it is just my lame blog :)))) hahaha

Thank you, pal! :D

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